Day 68: Winter is Coming

It’s suddenly turned cold. I wear two jumpers around the house normally, and tea and my new blanket have become my best friends. When I go outside, I normally wear my winter jacket.

While I’m not really a fan of cold, there is something wonderful about the briskness in the air, the vivaciousness of crackling leaves, and the comfort in a cup of tea.

 

It’s also lovely to walk to uni every morning with my breath hanging in the air, the freezing moisture droplets sparkling in the sun. The other day I wrote this poem in my head as I walked to 9 am lecture:

This morning, the world was all dragons

Flowing up the hill to market street

Smoky breath mingling with the mist

That slouched uneasily over the river.

The town prepared:

Unlocking shop doors

Sweeping the pavement

Carting away the refuse

From forgotten nights.

For dragons, their red scales

Wrapped securely around their shoulders

Would descend

And ravage

And leave gold.

And I thought,

As smoke swirled from my own mouth

How sad it was to be a dragon

So reckless

And dangerous

And demanding.

I hope that made some sort of sense. :) Of course, poetry doesn’t have to make a lot of sense… not immediately. If anyone wants to do a close reading of that poem and find all the deep meaning in the poem, then go right ahead. It would be really interesting to see what people thought the poem was about, since I have quite a specific meaning in mind.

Finally, I should note that a number of interesting things happened last week, like Kayla and I getting bus passes and travelling around Fife, as well as the Gilbert and Sullivan society’s trip to Edinburgh. I have some photos from both of these trips, so as soon as the editing is done, I’ll have a couple more blogs to post.

Problems with Poetry 1: Critiquing Other’s Work

A couple of weeks ago I wrote a post on how to take criticism on your poems. I suggest that you all go read that before proceeding here, where I’m going to talk about how to critique someone else’s poems.

Firstly, I suggest you read the poem over a couple times. If it’s really long (think Paradise Lost) then you don’t need to do this, but since most poems are less than 300 words you can probably afford to read it through about three times to get a good feel for it. Before starting to write your critique you should make sure you know what the poem is talking about. It’s often helpful to include a quick, one-sentence summary of the poem in your review, just so the writer knows if it’s too clear, or not clear enough.

Then, you’ll want to give some advice. Remember, be specific. It doesn’t help at all to say ‘I noticed some problems with the rhythm.’ Instead, say ‘The last line of the third stanza is a little too long.’ Also, don’t just say you liked the feeling of the poem. Say exactly what you liked. Poem critiques seem to be very vague, but those don’t help the poem.

Here are a couple specific things you can watch out for:

1.       Rhythmic problems. If you find yourself stumbling over words then they should probably re-word it. Tell them where you stumbled and why. You can give them a suggestion for how to fix it, but don’t expect them to use your exact words. It is their poem, after all.

2.       Boring words. This especially applies to rhyming poems. If I see one more person rhyme ‘night’ and ‘light’ and ‘bright’ then I’m going to hurt them…  Also, check for generic words like laugh, sing, night, day, happy, sad, gone, life, death, etc. Poetry is about being original, and those words aren’t going to help.

3.       Boring expressions. Writing about ‘a night black as ink’ or ‘silky smooth hair’ or something like that will just make the poem feel cliché. Point out any clichés you notice.

And of course, remember to be balanced. Don’t just point out the problems; make sure to mention exactly what you like. Be specific, but talk a bit about big picture stuff. In short, write a thoughtful, helpful critique, just as if you were reading a short story or novel. Why not head right over to inkpop.com and read some poetry right now?

Problems with Poetry 2: Listening to Critiques

While a lot of people assume that writing a poem is dead easy, they also seem to have great difficulty in editing their poetry. Some people think that it’s just feelings, and how can they possibly edit feelings to make them ‘better’? Others just can’t find anything ‘wrong’. A poem is just the words that fly out onto the page, right?

In my not-so-humble-opinion… wrong. Poems that are just feelings, just poured out, uncensored emotions, are like journal entries. They’re true, they’re right, they’re a piece of you… but they aren’t great literature. Just like I wouldn’t hand you my journal and tell you ‘This is the next bestseller’ you can’t hand me a poem you wrote right after your boy/girlfriend broke up with you and say ‘I’m going to get this published.’

A journal entry could eventually be moulded into a story, but there’s absolutely no way you’d publish it as is (unless you’re somehow famous and people want to read about your personal life.) In the same way, your poem, like any potential piece of literature, is going to need work. And for you to improve your poems you’ll need advice from other writers. This post is for all of you who want to improve your poetry writing by listening to critiques from others.

1.       Read their critique through a couple times and give yourself a day or two to think about it.

2.       You don’t need to take ALL the advice. If something doesn’t ring true for you, don’t use it. Just remember to always give it a decent shot before tossing it out.

3.       Be open to criticism. Remember that your poem can probably be made ‘better.’

4.       When someone says something isn’t clear, then you probably need to make it slightly more obvious.

5.       If you based your poem on real life, be ready to change the facts to make it more interesting. Changing names is also a good idea. J

6.       If the poem was written in an emotional moment, give yourself a few days, months or even years before trying to edit.

And lastly, don’t post your poetry on a writing website and ask people to read it if you’re not interested in making changes. If all you want is for people to tell you that you’re wonderful, go show it to family members who have to say that you’re amazing. Don’t post it online and then get annoyed every time someone gives you a critique. I understand that there is poetry that is so personal you can’t stand to have it ripped apart, but if that’s the case you probably shouldn’t be posting it on a writing website. In short, be open to criticism, learn to love it, and get ready to make your poem as amazing as it possibly can be. Poetry’s just another art form, one that requires practice.

Problems with Poetry 3: Choosing the Perfect Words

When you’re writing a novel, you can spare a word or two. In a short story, every word counts. In a poem, every syllable has to be perfect.

Most poems are short, with fewer than 300 words. Have you ever tried to write a story that short? My short story, ‘Because You Laughed’ is around 3000 words. Most poems are only a tenth of that, and many are much shorter. And yet, somehow good poems manage to pack as much of an emotional punch as any good short story or novel, despite the fact that they are so much shorter.

How do they do that? One way is by choosing the absolutely perfect words. For novels, often we’re told to write simply and clearly. Dialogue tags are a bad thing. Use ‘walked’ instead of ‘ambled’ so that the reader can skim over it and get to the good stuff.

The thing with poetry is that it’s all good stuff. There are no boring parts in a poem, no really exciting scenes connected by a boring conversation or two. It all has to be perfectly crafted. And that means you probably don’t want the reader to skim over any part of the poem. You want your reader to savour every word.

That doesn’t mean that you should crowd your poem with ‘thee’s and ‘thou’s and ‘Werefore art thou, Romeo’s. Using long/archaic words doesn’t necessarily help your poem. On a related note, don’t ever use a word that you’re not sure of its meaning (this goes for novels, too) just because it sounds good. I have seen people use long words just because they think it makes them look smart, when they’re actually using it in the wrong way.

Make sure you know exactly what all your words mean. Know all the possible meanings. Don’t just know that ‘ambled’ means ‘walked.’ Know that ‘ambled’ means ‘walked, somewhat slowly, a little lazily, sort of slow and steady, without-a-care-in-the-world kind of walk.’ You won’t find that definition in a dictionary, but you need to know the associations that come with the word. If your character is upset, you don’t want to say that they ‘ambled quickly.’ That’s an oxymoron, and it really doesn’t fit.

Choose words by their precise meaning. Choose the perfect words. Don’t settle for the one you think of first. Use a thesaurus, use your brain, read other poems. Do whatever it takes, but find the absolutely perfect word for your particular use. Listen to how it sounds, and the context other writers have used it in. Always remember, in poetry every word must be perfect. 

Problems with Poetry 2: Meter

Poetry is something that confuses a lot of people. Maybe you find it really easy to write, but when you try to critique someone else’s all you can say is ‘This is great.’ Or perhaps you’re more like me and you really struggle writing poetry, but you love critiquing other people’s work. And yet, sometimes you just tell someone ‘this isn’t working’ and you don’t know why.

One thing that a lot of people don’t understand about poetry is meter. Years ago, I thought meter was just the number of syllables in a line and if I just counted the syllables properly—like a haiku—I’d have poetry. I never understood why it didn’t work out.

While syllables are certainly important, what most people miss is that some syllables are stressed, and others aren’t. We all unconsciously know about stresses; after all, you need to know the stressed syllable in a word to know how to pronounce it. For instance, ‘family’ is FA-mi-ly, not fa-MI-ly or fa-mi-LI. My favourite example is trying to put the emPHAsis on the wrong syLAble. It’s actually kind of amusing when you try to say certain words wrong on purpose.

In many poems, even unrhymed ones, meter plays a large role. My professor likes to use the example of a famous Doctor Seuss rhyme:

That Sam-I-Am

That Sam-I-Am

I do not like

That Sam-I-Am

The syllables in bold are the ones that you stress whenever you say it. For instance, if you were using this as a jump-rope rhyme, those syllables would be the ones where you jump. There’s no way you’d say THAT sam I am. It just doesn’t sound right.

Whether or not you’re sticking to a meter in your poetry, just be aware that words with more than one syllable will have one stress, and it’s not always the first syllable. DANger, PRACtice and ACtive all have the stress on the first syllable, while aGREE, heLLO and baNAna have the stress on the second syllable.

With this in mind, consider the following ‘poem’:

Banana, Banana

I love my banana

It works, right. Unstressed, then stressed, then unstressed. Repeat three more times. However, this next one (even though it has the same number of syllables) doesn’t work:

Banana, Banana

Please agree, banana

Aside from the fact that the poem is complete and utter nonsense, what’s wrong with it? In the second line, the stress is all wrong. The rhythm makes us want to say A-gree, rather than a-GREE, and we know that’s wrong, so we start stumbling. It’s possible to say it sensibly, if you cut the sing-songy voice you’d use for doctor Seuss, but it doesn’t roll as smoothly off the tongue as in the first example.

When you’re writing poetry, one thing you want is for it to have a nice rhythm. Next time you’re writing a poem and a line just sounds off, or someone says that they found themselves stumble over it, start checking stresses. The ‘perfect’ word can’t just have the right number of syllables. It also has to have the proper stresses.

So, that’s my really brief lesson on meter. If you’d like to hear more about meter and how some famous poets, such as Milton and Shakespeare used it, I’d be happy to write another post or two. Otherwise, I’ll move on to some aspects of more modern poetry. Please comment if you’d like more on meter, or if there’s anything else you want me to talk about. 

Problems with Poetry 1: Introduction

Poetry is one of those things that a lot of people seem to have trouble with. Maybe you can dash off a poem in a couple minutes when you feel sad, and yet you can’t critique anyone else’s work to save your life. Perhaps you can read a poem and know when something feels ‘off’ but you have no idea what to tell the author so that they can fix it.

Poetry is one of those things that is both incredibly easy and terribly hard. Most poems are short and fairly quick. They may seem to be simple. You could write a poem in a minute. But to actually write a good poem, the kind of work that will be read and studied and praised, takes practice. Becoming an accomplished poet is no easier than writing a good novel, and critiquing a poem shouldn’t be any harder than critiquing a story.

The main difference between poetry and a story is that poetry is a lot more subjective. You can read a story and realize ‘this is not a good subject for a story’ but it’s really hard to tell someone that their poem isn’t working. If they wrote it on a bad day, when a friend died or something terrible happened, who are you to tell them it sucks?

It’s a lot harder to tell when a poem is ‘perfect.’ Since it’s so short, it may need to be completely re-written, or just a couple of words changed. Some advice for poets: be open to change. In the poem you’re telling your story, your emotion. Perhaps the form that you picked at first isn’t actually the best one for what you want to write about. Maybe the words you chose at first don’t quite work. I firmly believe that in poetry there isn’t a right and wrong way, but there certainly is ‘good’ and ‘better’.

Over the next couple weeks, I’ll be posting a series on poetry. Next week I’ve got a post on meter all ready to share with you, and I’m working on one to do with choosing the perfect words. I’ll probably think up a couple other topics to write about. If you have anything you’d like me to address, or a tip that you think I should mention, then feel free to post in the comments.

I’m not a really good poet myself, so if anything I say in this series sounds stupid to you, then just ignore it. I’m not trying to tell you how to write a poem, because there’s no way I could do that. I want to inspire you. I want you to think about poetry, and read other people’s poems, and then go write some yourself. I want to give you tips so you can write better, critiquing advice so that you can help others. In the end, I want you all to love poetry and appreciate it for the difficult, and rewarding art it is.